The day I realized Americans obsess over bathrooms

I ask you a question, are you distracted by issues engineered to cause enmity in America? I am not a fan of the bathroom drama because I think it's polarizing. A quick uninformed recap: Transexual people make a big deal about going into ladies bathrooms which I presume they've been doing for years, then everyone else makes a big deal as though they can actually make and enforce laws against it and I'm over here like... What is everyone even talking about? You do know we are the most privileged country in the world to have this many bathrooms right? America probably has more toilets than people. It's insane! And frankly, I'm not nearly as worried about everyone's safety in the restrooms as I am about our lavish waste. How many stalls do they make for the men's bathrooms that stand empty while all of us ladies with our little kiddies in tow cross our legs and stand and wait? Who thought up this elaborate bathroom scenario where my husband with three daughters stands within 20 feet of 20 toilets uncomfortable with every option. I'll stop here short of announcing that all of the public restrooms in America should be reconfigured. I'm no engineer but it's dumb. 

I don't see any outcry against homosexuals going in bathrooms with heterosexuals so all of the hooplah has a very hollow ring for me. I think sex designated restrooms are an archaic, ridiculous, weird, pointless exercise. If we are worried about transexuals getting beat up in the men's rooms or just feeling out of place and girls being targeted by pedophiles through the loophole, maybe we need to think bigger. Maybe we need restrooms for everyone with fully enclosed stalls. Maybe we need a little privacy, not a million special exceptions. Maybe we should conserve and think wisely. You know, the more elaborate we all get with our restroom expectations, the more we pay for whatever we buy at these stores. 

Here's the other thing, forget all about the sexual preferences and just picture yourself in Target on any random day. Ok who do we see? Moms with their kids (boring), dads with their kids(out of control), grandparents with their grandkids (going broke), goofy teenagers way over the top with the PDA and excessive junk food purchases, single young professionals buying keurig pods, a BIKER!? Wow, that is interesting he's with a little girl in a pink tutu. Let's hope she wasn't kidnapped! Ok now go in the bathroom. Who is there? All of those ordinary people. Now enter the dastardly pedophile. He walks in... Damn there's a scary biker in the ladies room with his little tutu clad beauty helping her into the stall instead of sending her in there alone because he's welcome to do that now. The pedophile looks for an easy target but his eyes meet the steely gaze of the biker. Game over. Let's try a different scenario. Lucky pedophile enters and finds easy prey but he knows a man or woman could walk in at any second. Not so easy as it was when only women were coming in here. Let's try again, pedophile gets caught in the act by me. I scream like a girl and men run into the ladies room without inhibition. After all they are welcome here now. Men are bigger scarier and stronger than me. And most of them are dying to be a hero. 

In conclusion, this is just about the dumbest argument I've ever seen America get into and I contend that the bathrooms will be neither more nor less dangerous. The danger could increase for older kids and teens but it will certainly decrease for toddlers and small children. As long as the men keep the restroom clean and start carrying pocket knives again like any self respecting American, I say come on in. Make the pervs squirm. And about the transgender movement. I have no idea why they care which bathroom they're in because I don't as long as it's clean. But come on in! What we really need is gender neutral bathrooms with fully enclosed stalls like Israel and a neutral hand washing area. 

I will clarify that changing into gym clothes at school is a whole different ball of wax. No boys allowed!