Halfway

On Friday as I bumbled along in the back seat with Bedford's head lolling over the seat we headed for Tel Aviv. It's funny that Israel is the size of New Jersey but yet they have such a variety of climates and landscapes. Tel Aviv is on the Mediterranean Sea so it's humid, green (when I was there anyway) and rather lush with more flat and rolling hills. Jerusalem is more hilly, rocky and an average humidity. So, we dropped off their horse at the doggy day care and he was thrilled. The boy and I cozied up for a long weekend in the back seat together.

Ashkelon was our lunch destination. It was pouring rain. Bart was worried about going to the desert during a deluge but Doug said we should go for it so we did and I'm glad even if everyone did suffer each in their own way. As the Bartletts like to say, during a lot of it "we had fun without having fun", the rest was fun or just crazy and unreal. In Ashkelon the recommended restaurant was closed so we went to "Meat Me". It was... good food and nobody spoke any english. They conveyed to us that they were searching for their english menu and we saw them search high and low to no avail. We finally ordered some beef and some chicken (the usual options in Israel) and he told us it would be $500. Doug dealt with it quickly asking how many zero's and he said one so my heart resumed beating. We sat down to eat. Doug felt compelled to take my picture in this clash of cultures with a rather alarming/disturbing phrase in the background though I daresay the Israeli's probably think it's clever and have no innuendo in mind... There were napkin dispensers from the 80's in America and a real live cigarette vending machine. I loved my lunch at "Meat Me" so much that I took several pictures.

We made a brief stop at the Mediterranean Sea but it was cold and windy so we picked up sea shells for my munchkins at home and skedaddled. 

After that we were back in the car pell mell and off to the border of Gaza just to say we went. We parked by the border and Doug and his mini me (Warren) rhapsodized over how close we were to Gaza and how we would all die if we crossed the border until Bart very calmly asked if we could leave. 

I think if she had known how the rest of our day would pan out she might not have bothered to feel any angst. It was to be the theme of her day. I was just a small child in the back seat without a care in the world kicking the seat in front of me and begging people to listen to my headphones with me so I really didn't add any gray hairs to my head. I guess it's not nice to brag. I guess I did join reality now and then to laugh like an imbecile and shrug my shoulders and wish for wifi so i could make nonsensical Facebook posts about my adventures on the border of Egypt and Gaza. Anyway, we got lost. We were headed for the desert to camp with the Bedouins and ride camels the next day but the Israeli version of Siri took us on a rather extensive off track tour of southern Israel. What eventually happened was we crossed over into a military zone, got stopped by a very scary looking humvee full of Israeli soldiers who wanted to know what we were doing. Since we were lost, we didn't really have to play the part we just acted dazed and confused which we were. They sent us packing and Bart forbade me from taking a picture of them which was torture. Ithink if she had known how the rest of our day would pan out she might not have bothered to feel any angst. It was to be the theme of her day. I was just a small child in the back seat without a care in the world kicking the seat in front of me and begging people to listen to my headphones with me so I really didn't add any gray hairs to my head. I guess it's not nice to brag. I guess I did join reality now and then to laugh like an imbecile and shrug my shoulders and wish for wifi so i could make nonsensical Facebook posts about my adventures on the border of Egypt and Gaza. Anyway, we got lost. We were headed for the desert to camp with the Bedouins and ride camels the next day but the Israeli version of Siri took us on a rather extensive off track tour of southern Israel. What eventually happened was we crossed over into a military zone, got stopped by a very scary looking humvee full of Israeli soldiers who wanted to know what we were doing. Since we were lost, we didn't really have to play the part we just acted dazed and confused which we were. They sent us packing and Bart forbade me from taking a picture of them which was torture. 

There's a little map of our tour though I really can't say where we went off track seeing as how I was oblivious most of the time. 

At one point we wound up in some kind of settlement behind a gate, unable to find our way back to any recognizable road. It was funny... well give me a break. I was a little kid kicking the seat. 

Finally after a harrowing drive through the desert in a deluge... Bart said we almost washed off of a bridge at one point... I was blissfully unaware... Doug got us to the place just in time for dinner. That was the best dinner of my freaking life after trekking back and forth from the car to the room through shin deep water with all of our luggage, pillows, blankets and sleeping bags. Sorry, no pictures. It would have been completely impossible, though it would have made a hilarious movie. 

Ahhhh dinner! Blessed amazing dinner!

We had tea by the fire and warmed up and tried to dry out a little. It was pretty magical. I'm still amazed at the lengths the Bartlett's all went to entertain me... little old me. 

The next day we had a lovely breakfast with what Harrison declared were the best eggs ever and many more sumptuous foods and teas. They had green tea and Bedouin tea. I liked the green tea personally. After breakfast and dinner both people staying there played music and sat around drinking tea and laughing. It's a very magical place. 

Here's what you saw right after you came out the door of our lodge.

 This is the restrooms but they're so pretty I had to take a pic. I was basically standing in the sunshine brushing my teeth.

This is the lodge we stayed in.

Yes, those tracks were right by the place we stayed the morning after the deluge!!! In the parking lot by our lodge. 

I'm outa juice. I keep stopping in the middle of a day. It bugs me. 

Part 1 My Trip

When I was seven, I had sticky gooey hands, long scraggly fingernails and stains on every garment I owned. I drove my sister crazy. If a person had held my sticky hand and looked into my eyes and said "stop borrowing your sisters clothes and staining them, she's going to stand by you through some pretty crazy situations and you need to keep her on your good side" I might not have taken the advice but I know I would have believed the speaker. I always knew my sister would ride the roller coaster of life with me. I took that for granted. It was a vague nameless assurance in my heart. When I was 19 I was a slightly plump, aimless and sometimes blonde, sometimes not office girl. I wore borderline inappropriate clothes to my job at an engineering firm and had no plan for my future. If a person had grabbed my arm one pretty spring day that year and pointed at Jody as he stood at the front desk waiting for his job interview and said "he's going to ride the roller coaster with you and you'll have four kids together within the next 12 years", I don't think I would have believed such a forecast quite so surely. But alas, what we foresee never comes and what we never could have imagined does. Which brings me to the incongruous story of my trip to Israel. Through mutual acquaintances I became friends with Jen Bartlett about two years ago. My first definitive memory is sitting in the salon at Jenny's house having my hair done for the spring gala at school. Bart popped in from next door with little hair clips all over her head of wet hair and chatted us up. We discussed what we were going to wear and I darkly asked her if Jenny had already told her I was pregnant. Her face is always an open book so I had the amusing experience of dropping a bomb on her that ricocheted into a million expressions. I'll never forget it. I'll never forget the reactions of every single person I told I was pregnant with Hazel though so I guess that time of my life is crystalized in my memory for ever. Now, if at that point a person had told me that Bart and her husband Doug would someday fly me to Israel and give me the experience of a lifetime just for kicks I certainly would have thought they were crazy. But that's exactly what happened. She had moved to Israel for Doug's work when one day she said "would you ever consider coming to visit?" I said "yes, when Jody finally wins the lottery we'll be on the next flight." She laughed and said "no seriously, if Doug could get you a ticket with airline miles would you come?" I screamed and told her she had to be kidding me of course I would come. She kept asking me if I really meant it and if I was sure so I finally settled down enough to say that I guessed I had better talk to Jody. I found out later why she didn't believe me when I said yes. All of her family and two friends had already declined her invitation. I was stonewalled. I could not believe these people. Of course all of them had been on international trips and they knew what all of the trade offs of international travel were. I, on the other hand was a novice. So, Jody agreed to let me go without hesitation because he loves me like nobody knows how to except him. They invited him as well and at one point I thought he would come with me but then he decidedly declined... just like all of those other people much to my amazement. I like to think that many people declined because they thought it would be impolite to accept the free plane ticket. Maybe they didn't want to be ingratiating. I still find it all puzzling but fortunate for ME! I will admit, there were some difficult moments, weaning Hazel and tearing myself away from her made me cry quite a bit, but something just pushed me through it telling me it was now or never. So, the girl who's seen the ocean once got a passport and hopped on a big jet airplane. I got the best seats in coach because Doug flies all of the time and he bought my ticket. I was so excited I was like a little child. When our plane took off from my Newark connection I looked out my window and practically squealed to the flight attendant "Is that the Statue of Liberty????!!!!" He gave me a tolerant smile and said "yes it is." I was over the moon! A little bonus to my trip I hadn't even thought of. That flight was 6,000 miles. It flew by though. I slept some, read some and boom I was already landing in Tel Aviv. The world was lush, green and beautiful with the Mediterranean Sea glowing blue. I came to the meeting area and there was Bart. She told me later she realized she was about to cry just waiting and hoping I hadn't bailed at the last second (a ridiculous notion). And there they were with my welcome sign, immediately buying me coffee. They pumped me with so much coffee the first two days I was vacillating between arrhythmia and incontinence.

We got into their car and headed straight for Jerusalem. It's about an hour away. Bart and I were like little teenagers sitting in the back calling Doug our driver. I thought I was so funny that day but after being in about 30 taxis in my ten days there, I realized it isn't all that sensational to sit in the back seat and tell a driver to take you somewhere. (more on taxis later!) So we went straight to the Old City and walked through the market where Doug made me try my first fresh squeezed pomegranate juice. Amazing and unforgettable. Then we went down the Via Dolorosa. It was amazing. We saw the jail cell where Jesus was held. A very sobering and real moment for me. I was later to discover that it's simply amazing that it's still there because the entire city has been built on top of several times over. And significant locations almost all have churches built on top of them with little or no access to the actual place. It's a strange thing to go to an old part of the world; to see ruins where something beautiful was destroyed just to make a point and then built on top of and hidden for thousands of years. After that they took me out to lunch. And this was when I realized I wasn't just going to pal around with Jen and hang out with her and see what it's like to live in Jerusalem. They wined and dined me and I still have no idea why but it was impossible to say no. It was incredible and amazing and unforgettable. I had the time of my life. This was the lunch at the Moroccan restaurant. It was a five course meal. After that we went home and ran Harrison to his guitar lesson. I got to meet his teacher and his wife walked down to a cafe with us for coffee. Then we walked to the old city and sat in an outdoor amphitheater and watched the history of Jerusalem in holograms on the buildings in the dark. I loved it. I am amazed just retelling this that I've been blogging for an hour and have only gotten through one day. We tried to get a taxi on the way home but Bart was just waving down random cars instead of taxis so we wound up walking. LOL!