I might not reach 100

Someday I will look at this big hole where A month was lost without a blog. Lost in the vortex a delightful visit from Grammy and Bonka Barry; a Valentine's Day with apple beniets and prime tenderloin steaks grilled to perfection, a tedious but delightful thrifting trip, my kids glowing under the special treatment of one on one time with their beloved grandparents, good food, lots of laughter and plenty of Stella love. 

Lost also, the trauma of Eden faltering under the crushing pressure of peers and teachers her first year of middle school.

I won't wonder that I never blogged about the terrific parent teacher conference with Nicks teacher because as with all small victories and failures, they get lost in the swirling mind of a mom multitasking and playing hot potato all day and all night until her heart shrivels like a raisin. Perhaps some mothers can handle four little hearts with grace and balance and mercy and wisdom and eternal patience without satans little friends "guilt" and "incompetence" creeping in to undermine this great and daunting work. Perhaps. But for me, all it takes is one shake of the tree and I've lost my equilibrium enough for him to bend my ear. To whisper who he says I am and wilt me like a cut stem. The upside is, I'm on to him. He might have me for awhile but eventually I remember to ask for truth and reject his crippling lies. The truth comes to me in bits and pieces of the Word spoken over me by my parents. I'm placed here for such a time as this, I'm blessed, I'm annointed to bind up the broken-hearted, to set the captives free, to proclaim the victory of my God. I'm a minister to my children. I am an oak planted by the water. I am a ruby in my fathers hand. I am a warrior against principalities and powers of darkness. I am a child of God protected by his his wings and so are my children. They will rise up and call me blessed. And they will be as arrows in my hand . I will stand on it, the unshakeable foundation of the Word.