Friday, August 6, 2010

The Circuitous Path

As I turned onto our street, my eyes were glued to the 100 inch long sofa in the back of the truck. The rope had slipped down to the legs and each small bump was giving me a jump. Suddenly the bump of my life hit and I realized that I had hit a large curb with the van and shot the front tire. I oozed the car over to the curb and got out and walked home. My shoulders slumped and I trudged up the driveway to make my confession to Jody. He didn't say much which made me want to kick myself or put an icepick through my hand, I wasn't sure which. We headed up the street and he looked at the tire. We went back down the street to grab the jack and all of the kids. I looked at the couches I'd just purchased to hopefully net $300 profit. "Well, I wish I hadn't bought those couches" I said. He looked up surprised and asked me why. I rambled on about how if I hadn't bought the couches I wouldn't have popped the tire and blah blah blah. He still didn't say much and was about to go in the house. He paused and looked back at me with a twinkle in his eye and said "well, I don't think we'll be able to salvage the tire!". My eyes almost bugged completely out of my head. "Well, of course not, the side wall is shredded Jody!" He gave a chuckle and said "oh they were just about shot anyway!" And then I really did want to put an icepick through my hand just because I was sure I didn't deserve a husband like that.
I spent the next three days mulling over what we should do. Should we get two new tires, one new tire, four used wheels with tires so we could switch winter tires easier or just used tires in general? On Monday Jody and I hunted through Craigslist and I called every tire dealer in Longmont and Boulder. While on the phone with a tire dealer I realized that the rear tire had a huge bubble and was about to pop. I guess I grazed the curb with it too. UGH. We decided to buy four used tires from a guy down in Centennial for $100. I drove down during rush hour, threw them in the truck and flew up to Erie for Kaitlyn's meet the class party. It was easily 3 hours spent in the car and $20 or more for gas. I got them home and Jody pointed out that one was bald and the others weren't in the greatest shape. I beat myself up about that for awhile and then went to bed. The next day we took the tires over to Discount Tire and I asked a nice guy named Josh to please pick out the four best tires and put them on the van. He went back and forth examining and finally stood in front of me with an apologetic expression. "Ma'am, those tires aren't going to fit your van." All of the air rushed out of me. I said "they're 16s aren't they?" He nodded silently. "My husband is going to KILL me for not double checking the size" I knew it was a lie because Jody is a saint and for some reason he loves me in spite of every idiotic thing I do and he'll still just pull me in for a hug and tell me he loves my legs or that I'm cute in those pants. The nice tire guy said "did you buy these here or did they come on your van?" I said "my husband bought them here" rather miserably and without expectation. He said "can I check the mileage? We might be able to work something out." I figured best case scenario, this was going to be a $10 discount on new tires or something but hey, I wasn't going to dick around anymore, it was time for me to lay down some cold, hard, nonexistent cash. He held the door open for my ragtag crew and I stood at the counter while all three children sat on high stools swiveling themselves around at dizzying speeds and Josh typed and typed. Finally he looked up at me and smiled "Ma'am, I can put two new tires on your van for $48. The room tilted and for a second I swear I was going to hug him... then I briefly considered telling him that I would hug him if I wasn't so sweaty... then I just said "you're kidding me." He shook his head and said "your husband got road hazard and they're fully covered. You just have to pay to renew the hazard and $15 per tire to have them mounted. You think that'll make him happy?" Here he was actually thinking I had a mean husband. LOL! I guess it served me well to make Jody out as a monster. I nodded and blinked. I said, "so are they the same tires?" He said, "well, actually you had 50,000 mile tires and we're going to put 85,000 mile tires on because that's what we have on hand." I thanked him several times and left.
I called the craigslist man in Centennial and he agreed to take the tires back because he had sold them to me as 17s and they were 16s. I just had to drive back to Centennial.
I told Jody later that it seems some people take direct routes to accomplish things and some people like me, consistently take the longest hardest path possible to accomplish basically the same thing. Rather like the process of identifying Jody's cancer and removing it. Did it really need to take 12+ years? Perhaps that's why it's so hard to sell our house. Once we have completed our very long and arduous route, we'll arrive at basically the same conclusion as everyone else. And maybe, if nothing else, we'll appreciate the result more than someone who put their house on the market and sold it in one week. I can't say that I can see a greater benefit from the long hard route, but it's a life. Maybe the lesson is patience. Patience is, after all, a virtue. And I can't think of a single person who's ever said "Jody and Elizabeth are the most patient people I know".

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