Merry Christmas

December 14, 2009
Dear Family and Friends,

It has been awhile since I have written a Christmas letter but I'm turning the tide this year. It's been another rollercoaster year in the world of the Allen family. I guess everyone knows, last fall Jody was diagnosed with thyroid cancer and the first surgeon didn't remove all of the cancer. This spring we elected to go to the Mayo Clinic and have one of the best surgeons available perform the very delicate job of finding and removing the remaining cancer. It was a huge effort, supported by both of our families, that paid off enormously. Jody recently got the great news that he is very healthy and has only two very small questionable lymph nodes that may have to be looked at in a few years. They can't even be confirmed as cancer at this point. It's wonderful news, but the experience has changed us. We've now crossed the rivers of unemployment, being unable to sell our home in Minnesota, and learning contentment as renters the past couple of years. Now, we can truely empathize with any person facing the uncertain news of cancer. I can't help but be reminded of the parable Jesus told of the pruning of the vine so it could bear more fruit. I am happy to say, that our family now bears much fruit of God's goodness, when compared with the spiritual desert we complacently resided in just two short years ago. I can't say we've arrived, but God is definitely at work in our lives and the change is deeply satisfying.
My day to day is a bit of a disaster. Everyone knows I'm as haywire as they come. It didn't matter much when I was a stay at home mom to preschoolers, but we've now transitioned to school. I have to rise early and remember some detail every morning when I take Eden to school. There's homework, library books, tennis shoes on gym days... the list goes on. I'm not proud of the fact that I never do seem to get it all right, but I suppose the children will muddle through their school years as well as possible despite their deeply flawed mother. It is nice that we have new teachers each year. I know Eden is always loved by them, but having me for a class parent might be a little too much for any teacher for years on end. Between that, chasing two toddlers, keeping track of our escape artist dogs and buying and selling furniture, I rarely have time to put on a belt or tweeze my eyebrows.
Jody has been work - work - working as usual. His company is staying afloat amid the difficult economy and I'm thankful they have a strong business plan and know how to cut corners to prevent layoffs as much as possible. He's been riding his bike like he used to, before Eden was born and going to spin class most mornings at the gym. I told him the other day that his chiseled face is very distracting. How do I put a she devil face here? He loves it when I embrarras him... or maybe I just wish he loved it. He also built Eden's rabbit, Cotton a cage this fall that I like to call the "Taj Ma Hutch". The rest of his evenings are consumed with homework, pillow fights and wrestling matches and a bit of furniture refinishing.
Eden is seven this year and she has been trying out different hobbies. She finished up gymnastics in the spring, tried riding a horse and did a soccer clinic this fall. She announced yesterday as she got into the car after school that she needed to start Karate right away. Apparently there's been a recent rash of kiss chase on recess. She's doing great in first grade. She loves science and history and has grown by leaps and bounds in just one semester. I really can't believe that they call this first grade; she knows what an atom is, how a circuit works and who the phonecians were. She knows six parts of speech and how to write a letter from begining to end correctly.
Kaitlyn is four this year and this will be her last year at home under my wing. She works on her phonics daily and is constantly doing educational games on the computer. She is learning how to form letters, capitalize and space words on the computer and can sound out almost anything. She loves to type messages, write letters and makes er... well... abstract art for me. She's been taking violin since September and is on the brink of learning how to play "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star." I feel giddy when I watch her little fingers gaining confidence and skill on her tiny little instrument. I'll miss having her as my little buddy next fall.
Nicholas still has me wrapped around his little finger. I am starting to treat him like a big boy but I was struggling, as my entire family so nicely pointed out. He's very active, loves to build, loves to tumble and do acrobatics; but most of all, play with his cars and trucks. He talks enough for us to understand his needs but still bursts into spontaneous tirades of gibberish that send the whole family into laughter. He's expressive, charming and loves to cuddle. We have the tantrums and all of the lovely little two year old dealings but overall, he's a very good little two year old, even if he has been coddled a bit.
We'd love to hear from any and all of you. It seems like over time, addresses and phone numbers have a way of getting lost but it doesn't change the feelings of goodwill we cherish towards you all. May everyone's Christmas be filled with good memories and special time spent with family.

Love,
Jody, Elizabeth, Eden, Kaitlyn and Nicholas

I think it's important for me to record this.

I have done Eden a terrible disservice and really have no way of making it up to her. She cried, I cried, then I cried again because of the horrible guilt. Somehow, this past fall, I sat down with the school calendar and recorded on my master calendar that Eden's Winter Musical would be on Wednesday, December 9th. By some mental acrobatics, I somehow managed to change that to December 16th in my mind. By some crazy twist of fate, both dates were wrong and it was, in fact, Monday, December 14th. It was last night, and Eden missed it. All of that would be understandable aside from the fact that I received several correspondences from the school regarding the exact date and it never registered. This was compounded by the fact that Eden told me last weekend that it was on Monday and I didn't believe her. I thought she was confused. I glanced at my calendar and didn't even notice I had it written on the 9th, not the 16th anyway. So, somehow despite approximately 15 safety nets, I made Eden, dear Eden, miss her Christmas Musical. She practiced those songs for months, she anticipated wearing her most beautiufl dress, and then she had to go to school today and listen to all of her friends talk about it. I have cried on and off about ten times. I am overcome with regret. So, though I often make fun of my lack of organization, I really do wish I could ever just get the really important things right.

A little confession

Now, if this is not something that you identify with... please do me the favor of NEVER telling me. I realize that I am held to a higher standard by people judging my faith in Christ and I understand the logic. They think I find myself to be a better person deserving of heaven which is a complete misconception but is there nonetheless.
Sunday morning I rolled around in bed pretending I didn't need to get up yet. Finally at 9:20 I arose. I sailed into the kitchen to find Kait at the counter and Eden playing with the bingo game cage. I told them to run upstairs and get dressed quickly so we wouldn't be late for church. What I did not say was that they should disregard my lecture of the night before about their state of dereliction and desperate need for bathing. I ran downstairs to grab a shower because we all know that people will forgive dirty children but not dirty parents. I was in the third glorious minute of my shower when the pressure dropped and I realized the girls had independently decided to bathe. "GREAT." I got out of the shower, dashed upstairs and told them to hurry while digging everywhere for a clean pair of jeans that I like on me. None to be found. Gotta wear the old faithful black velvet pants, but it's freezing outside so then I had to paw through all of my drawers looking for the only pair of leggings I own to wear underneath. I finally felt sufficiently attired and turned back to the girls. They had decided to get out of the bath with dry hair. Now that was just pointless to me. I told them to wash each others hair and dashed downstairs to dry my hair. I got it about half dry and started getting the "Oh God, we're going to be late for CHURCH" ants in my pants. I dashed back upstairs and pawed through Nick's dresser looking for church clothes while lecturing the girls that they HAD to get OUT of the bath. They jumped out, I dashed back downstairs to answer the 10:00 doorbell and show some furniture that the lady did NOT buy and came back up a few minutes later to find Eden standing there telling me she had no idea what to wear to church. This was just the limit. All the while, Jody had been shoveling snow in the driveway and getting a shower himself, which turned out to be a 20 second shower where he shiveringly washed his hair. I dashed into Eden's room, found her some clothes and practically dressed her. Talked Kait into switching into a shirt that kind of matched her summer dress and tights she had chosen and then started trying to get Nick up so I could dress him. I had thrown several random items out trying to decide what would be both warm and cute on a 5 degree day. Not that Kait had cared, but all the same. Ya know? Eden showed up with her clothes on! Victory only to annouce that she had not conditioned her hair because she didn't have TIME. I exploded. Of course, having spent 30 minutes and an entire water heater full of water, I THINK she had time to condition her hair. I drug her quivering frame into the bathroom, slapped leave in conditioner into her hair and brushed it. Jody dressed Nick. Praise God. At this point, my neighbor Theresa whom I had invited to go to church with us was in the driveway, beautifully made up with smooth hair, fresh makeup and a cleaned off car. I started throwing granola bars at people and I KNEW I was not going to make it if I didn't get at least one cup of tea so I heated that up. We finally drug the whole clap trap crew out the door and made it to church on time.
I'm only sharing this story because I do know for a fact there is another woman who shared this same drama at a time in her life because Jody's mom told me so. No, it wasn't her! It was her sister and she said that she used to commit more sins getting her kids out the door to church, than the whole rest of the week. True, so true.
As I sat ready to take my communion at the end of church, all I could think of was how I had gotten up too late, had not laid out clothes for church, yelled at my daughter for my own lack of organization, had failed to give my family a breakfast due to my laziness and still sat primly in the pew with my symbolic cup of Christs blood which was shed for the very sins I committed that morning.